One Year Later

Last year, November 3rd, was probably the darkest day of my life. I was diagnosed with a "very large and very agressive brain tumor."

It hit Kirk and I like a kick in the stomach, it was so unexpected. I think we were in shock, and numb with fear. And oh, the sadness. It came over us in huge waves, making us fear we would drown in it. We held on to each other all night on that first night, crying and hoping that if we held on tight enough, this thing couldn't separate us, couldn't steal me away from him, from my family.

My children were so strong, so supportive. They wanted me to fight, but I just didn't know how much I was willing to go through, to put them through, if the outcome was likely to be the same. I didn't want to put my family through the pain Debbie's family went through.

Yes, November third, 2008, was the saddest and hardest day of my life, as were the next few days, before we saw Dr. Sarah Jost and got a glimmer of hope. How much different is November third, this year. Today Caleb Joseph, my second grandson is three months old. After the sadness of their miscarriage, Matt and Kelly are now parents to this sweet little boy.

In the midst of our sorrow and hardship last November, God was blessing us beyond our wildest dreams. Not only did He create Caleb, but also Keegan Jameson (the little angel in the photo above). While I was mourning that I probably wouldn't live to meet any more grandchildren, He was blessing me with two! And this November I have those two precious little boys in my life, and am expecting another, Casey Neal, in the next few weeks. God is so amazing! I don't think it was a coincidence that I found out about Caleb and Keegan on Christmas Day, and Casey on Easter weekend. God gave us His Son on Christmas, and Jesus gave us His life on Easter. The two holiest days of the year.

This November, 2009, my health is restored, my life is restored. I got to spend Halloween with all three grandsons, then celebrate Cooper's second birthday the next day. This weekend we will shower Megan with love and gifts for little Casey. My life is busy and full, rich with blessings and love. My heart is overflowing with gratitude to God for this place He has delivered me to. He has walked with me every step, through the difficult weeks of sickness, and through the present days of joy. I cannot thank Him enough.